Nursing home says probably sundowners

I’ve read everyone’s entries, and all seem quite different. Looking for a site that can give specifics on what to look for. Nursing home says probably sundowners, and was diagnosed w/demntia. At around 4:00 every day now she begins to go to the bathroom every 1/2 hr, start ordering us to shut the blinds, turn on the night lights, obsessed about what time it is, asks about every 5-10 minutes, does she have to take any more pills, gets REAL bossy & kinda mean. We cant sit down for a minute until she goes to bed! By then we cant wait for 9pm to roll around. She was SO confused in the Nursing Home that we moved her back to her home w/ 24/7 care in which we take our turns too. She was SO bad she’d yell & say nasty words I never even thought she knew!! A bit horrifying for someone who never ever swore! Her confusion became SO MUCH better when she got home in her own environment, but this “afternoon” thing is beyond anything I ever imagined! How do I help her – how do we cope? We’re even giving her Atavan & it doesn’t seem to help much. She’s beyond agitated, yet I dont want to give her more meds to make her zombie-like either.