Comments on: Managing Sundown

By: Sue

Sue — Tue, 01 May 2012 20:06:11 +0000

Hi everyone
My situation is a little different. My 85 year old father had no symthoms with memory or delusional thoughts before he went into the hospital with a heart attack and was told he needed by pass surgery. After the surgery he became agressive and try to take his ventilator out by himself and they sedated him for 6 days, then finally took out the ventilator. Since then he was moved to a rehab. He has all the signs of sundowners since then. He does not remember living in Florida thinks he is back in New York, get violence, thinks people are stealing from him etc. We have been told that this is a temporary thing and should go away in 4-6 weeks. Anyone else experience this? Help I feel Iike I have lost my father for ever.

By: Shannon

Shannon — Mon, 30 Apr 2012 13:22:21 +0000

@Barbara S., there are also some good monitoring systems (i.e. that can notify you/someone based on a door being opened, don’t know if her current system would have that capability but it might be worth switching if not)-those might be an option if she has not yet wandered…always good to prepare as it is a common issue. You can also register with the Alzheimer’s Assoc.-Safe Return program. We also have a program in our local area run via the police department using GPS technology. All worth checking in to for your peace of mind and her continued safety.

Especially when you have caregivers helping out, may be a good idea to keep a little log. This can help communicate between caregivers and family members (how she’s doing, changes, things that helped etc.) and note patterns.

By: Barbara S.

Barbara S. — Sat, 28 Apr 2012 23:11:09 +0000

My mom is 84 yrs. old. She is in early stage dementia but it’s progressing a lot faster than we had expected. Myself & 4 brothers and their wives are share the care-taking responsibilities. We have someone come in 3 days a week for 2 hrs. She has recently begun to have these symptoms of Sundowners. She’ll call one of her boys houses and is in a panic because she doesn’t know how she’s going to get home (she is in her home). She is so confused about so many things, it just scares me. I don’t think she’ll wander, especially at night because she doesn’t like the dark. I have made an appt. to get an evaluation done on her. ) Her PC, Loving Care Company (people that come in 3 X a week and my brothers & I, are trying to keep her in her mobile home, in a mobile park, for as long as we possibly can. It’s looks like one of the solutions to keep them from wandering is outside locks. This makes me uncomfortable for fear that when she realizes she can’t get out. she’ll be even more afraid. Also, she lives by herself, 3 of my brothers are within 1.3 miles of her and she has Lifeline. I am 7 miles away and try to visit her as many times a week as 3 – 4. However, someone checks on her everyday. I’m not looking for answers, just helpful hints, and I just needed to vent. Thank you for listening.

By: Kris

Kris — Tue, 17 Apr 2012 22:57:22 +0000

I have been taking care of my sister-in-law’s mother for 5 months now. She started with her dememtia about 5 years ago but after breaking her hip last October, there has been a real downhill decline. She also had a bed fall Christmas Eve and developed a brainbleed. It now covers 1/3 of the left side of her brain. I have been trying to tell her daughter that she is showing definate signs of sundowners. She gets so fearful when afternoon comes and starts wanting to go home.. she is at home. She asks about her mama and wants to call her to come over and stay with her.
The bleed has made her legs really weak and painful so she can’t get around without help and her walker. She constantly tries to get out of her recliner if I try to go to the bathroom. Terrified to be by herself.
The one difference I am thankful for is the fact that once she goes to sleep at night, she sleeps sound. Only up once for the bathroom.
I am just so exhausted. I stay 24/7 with her and have a girl that comes one day a week for 5 hrs.
I never thought something like this would be so hard.

By: chasity

chasity — Thu, 12 Jan 2012 22:25:26 +0000

Well I take care of my husband’d mother for the last 6 yrs.She has Alzheimer and it has gotten worse,the doctors prescribed all sorts of medication for her in the last six yrs and the only thing that seems to help some is zyprexa twice daily and trazadone at bedtime which I give her a 1/2 hour before bedtime..She does have sun downers also but with the medication she sleeps through the night but she is an early rise my problem is from 5 in the morning until 8 evening.She seems to think she’s and opera singer or something,she sings all day up until bedtime.

Chasity

By: Maryann

Maryann — Sun, 25 Dec 2011 03:34:28 +0000

My 96 year old mother just started exhibiting sundowners syndrome. She has been in a long term nursing facility since end of August. Her hallucinations sometimes coincide with a UTI which seem to be prevalent in nursing facilities. So she has a standing order on her chart that if her state of mind changes a urinalysis is done immediately. She communicates to me about her night terrors and it is always with a phone call about 8 am the next morning. I notice how intense they are becoming. She often thinks that the staff is plotting to kill her and her room mate is saying vulgar things about her children. It is becoming increasingly harder to help her out of these incidents. They are definitely happening more often. But just like a lot of you have said, she is fine in the day. I thank God for her afternoons because we still enjoy each other. Ii have requested a psychological evaluation on this Monday so hopefully some type of medication will be suggested.I have read many of the responses and feel I have gotten a very quick and thorough education on sundowners. I hope and pray that the rest of her life will not be with any violence and paranoia.

Maryann

By: HELEN

HELEN — Wed, 02 Nov 2011 23:07:52 +0000

To all of you caregivers: You all deserve your cloud in heaven. I can understand what you are going through but the only thing I can offer is to try to remember this is NOT the ‘real’ personality of your parent, I feel sure your parent would never want to hurt your feelings.

I am 63 years old and have had Multiple Sclerosis for 15 years. About 10 years ago I started having “rage attacks”, although I had really had a slowly progressing depression because I had MS. My urologist put me on IMIPRAMINE for urinary incontinence. Unfortunately the medication did nothing for my incontinence, but it was the BEST thing to help my depression and rage attacks.

Ask your parent’s doctor if this older medication might help the unpleasant attitude of your parent, it might help with urinary incontinence, too. It helped me in just a couple of days, so maybe it would be worth a try. (The only negative effect I have had is that I have had to continually increase the dosage over the years, but maybe your parent will not have that problem, but you can be on the watch for that if the attitude starts to regress.)

My best wished to all of you. HELEN

By: Eliz

Eliz — Sat, 27 Aug 2011 19:48:01 +0000

Oh I so feel for you, exactly what my Mom did.She passed away last summer but my life was the same. I got out 4 hrs. A week for groceries. The rest of the time it was just us. Mom couldn’t walk at all so always transfers , toilet, chair, bed etc. I lost 28 lbs. And I was already thin. The only thing I can say is try to take time to enjoy her everyday even if it’s just to give her something she loves to eat or drink. Try to connect with her as your Mom even tho you know your the mom now. I would try to make my mom laugh, but toward the end it was not easy and very exhausting to even keep her a little happy. Never a nights sleep. I finally had to move my mom so I could not hear her yelling for me all night. I would check on her and know she was safe , but I had to put a stop to the constant demands for water and the bathroom. Hang tough, try not to beat yourself up too much, even if it was perfect we would always have sadness and regrets…

By: CW in Texas

CW in Texas — Sat, 27 Aug 2011 15:32:16 +0000

Hey Rhonda,
I am the caregiver for my 85 yr old mother, who has stroke related dimentia. When she falls, I just sit down there with her, sometimes get us a cup of coffee, and sit and laugh with her until help arrives. She likes it, and it seems to take the “sting” out of the fall. She is extremely confused and is constantly wanting to know when I’m taking her to her house. We have lived in this same house for over 3 yrs, and have lived together for over 7 years. She also truly believes that when we are watching TV, that whatever is happening in the TV program, is happening to her – in real life- right now..as if it’s her in the TV. It’s really sad to watch, and it requires more patience than I ever knew that I have. But I have only one mother, and I was blessed with a wonderful one. I have to remember, she took care of me my whole life, now it’s her turn. She is the best mother I could ask for, and it breaks my heart to see her going down. But I have just basically put my life on hold for now, so that I can give her 100% of me. Good luck to all of you, and god bless you all.

By: Donna

Donna — Fri, 26 Aug 2011 22:47:51 +0000

Phew , been reading all these posts. I am carer for my live in my home ,89 mother.I am divorced and my children have left home so am the carer. Speedy nursescome in twice a week for full washing, but aside from that its all down to me. I have become a prisoner in my own home and am daeling with mixed emotions as well as being very worn out. My mother deteriorates at night, starting in the evening, cannot turn herself or get up etc . Feels she needs to pee several times, which is very exhausting as she can hardly hold her own weight. She cannot wash or dress herself,walks a few steps with a frame in the day. At night she is constantly calling my name in a horrible panis stricken way whish eats away at me. I have to get out of earshot and ignore her sometimes otherwise its is horribly draining. I feel as if my life is on hold ( but I except this in a calm way mostly and try to use the time mentally) sometimes feel I can’t go on. Nearly every day my mothe rsays she wishes she were dead…………….